Disc Golf Might Not Suck After All

If you have heard me hold forth on the subject of frisbee* disc golf before, you may be aware that I do not endorse it. Quite to the contrary, in fact. Playing ultimate frisbee* is all about the frenetic motion, dashing, catching the frisbee* disc at the utmost limit of your abilities - the dive, the leap into space.

It turns out just trying to throw a frisbee* disc with precision and accuracy is also lots of fun. Who knew?

Which one of these looks just like the other?

I happened upon this stunning revelation entirely by accident. The cover of a Tupperware container needed to be in the sink, but that was all of three steps away, and damned if I would bestir myself to go all the way over there just to put something in the sink. Upon further contemplation, it occurred to me that the cover was light, round, and mostly flat.

Suspiciously like a disc.

Shocked by this unexpected discovery, I theorized that, having a disc-like shape, it might travel through the air in a disc-like fashion if I gave it an initial acceleration in the way that I might a frisbee* disc. To paraphrase: if it walks like a duck and quacks like a duck, if I throw it like a duck, it should fly like a duck. Right?


It flew more like an egret. Maybe because I threw it like one. I would not dare to claim perfect duck-throwing skills, after all.

Nevertheless, fly it did, though ultimately it landed in the dish-drying rack rather than the sink. Enthused by this discovery, I retrieved the projectile and attempted again. Due to the air currents, (I theorized) it tilted contrary to the initial curve that I gave it. I persevered, however, and after perhaps 10 tries, I was finally satisfied with my throw. Some of those throws had actually ended up in the sink, but only because it had bounced off of something else. I wanted it to go in perfectly.

portrait of the blogger as a young duck-thrower

Elated by this simple diversion, it suddenly occurred to me that this was actually frisbee* disc golf writ small. Throw the disc, pick the disc up, throw it again. But I hate disc golf! How could I possibly be enjoying myself?

This has led to a profound re-examination of my life and opinions and prejudices and, like, all sorts of stuff. I would like to actually go to a course (is that the right term?) and try it out.

Fortunately, there is one nearby, so who knows? It might even actually happen.

And if it it turns out I do like it, what's next? Running? Curling? Synchronized swimming? Actual golf?


I am frightened of what I might become. Hold me.

*god damn it, Wham-O.